History Of A Drowning Boy by Dennis Nilsen

 

History of a Drowning Boy: The Autobiography by Dennis Nilsen.

Foreword by Criminologist Dr Mark Pettigrew

Published 21st January 2021 by RedDoor Press.

From the cover of the book:

In 2020, the three-part show featuring David Tennant, ‘Des’, was ITV’s biggest drama launch in 14 years with 10 million viewers. In January 2021, Dennis Nilsen’s abridged autobiography will be published for the first time.

Dennis Nilsen was one of Britain's most notorious serial killers, jailed for life in 1983 after the murders of 12 men and the attempted murders of many more.

Seven years after his conviction, Nilsen began to write his autobiography, and over a period of 18 years he typed 6,000 pages of introspection, reflection, comment and explanation.

History of a Drowning Boy - taken exclusively from these astonishing writings - uncovers, for the first time, the motives behind the murders, and delivers a clear understanding of how such horrific events could have happened, tracing the origins back to early childhood.

In another first, it provides an insight into his 35 years inside the maximum-security prison system, including his everyday life on the wings; his interactions with the authorities and other notorious prisoners; and his artistic endeavours of music, writing and drama. It also reveals the truth behind many of the myths surrounding Dennis Nilsen, as reported in the media.

Nilsen was determined to have his memoir published but to his frustration, the Home Office blocked publication during his lifetime. He died in 2018 entrusting the manuscript to his closest friend and it is now being published with the latter's permission.

Any autobiography presents the writer's story from just one perspective: his own, and as such this record should be treated with some caution. An excellent foreword by criminologist Dr Mark Pettigrew offers some context to Nilsen's words, and this important work provides an extraordinary journey through the life of a remarkable and inadequate man.

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It's a very rare thing to get a glimpse inside the mind of a serial killer, especially one as notorious as Dennis Nilsen, but this is exactly what this book offers. Written during his time incarcerated at various prisons around the UK, this autobiography has been put together by his friend Mark Austin, from the papers left to him by Nilsen, and offers a fascinating account of exactly what he has to say about his childhood, his life before becoming a killer, his crimes and his time as a Category A prisoner. It includes an intriguing introduction from Mark Austin, and a very insightful foreword by criminologist Dr Mark Pettigrew, both of which advise taking what comes next with some reservations - after all these are the words of a man who  committed heinous crimes, and more than likely suffered with a few personality disorders.

The book is split into two quite distinct parts. broken up into headings that deal with periods of his history. 

The first, and most distressing part of the book, deals with Nilsen's life before his imprisonment and is divided into sections dealing with his Early Life, where he tells of his distant mother, a grandfather who he maintains sexually assaulted him, and his awakening homosexuality; Army Life and Civilian Life, where he then moves onto his experiences in the army, the police force, and through various different jobs, as he becomes more and more disconnected from the people and places around him; and finally, Taking Life, as he describes his chaotic life, his string of casual sexual encounters, bouts of excessive alcohol consumption that make his inhibitions fall away , and how he falls prey to his developing urges and fantasies - culminating in his twelve murders, and many more attempted murders.

The descriptions of his crimes are unflinching, with details of each murder dispassionately laid out on the page, but interestingly he concentrates on the ritualistic side of the killings and his compulsions, rather than going into too much detail about the dismemberment and disposal of the the bodies that he is most remembered for - with passing references to the disposal of the bodies being more than enough for me, and the rituals thankfully redacted in some cases. Even so, this part of the book did make me feel rather grubby and in need of more than a few breaks with some more wholesome reading material!

The second is simply entitled Life, and deals with his arrest, trial and 35 years behind bars, split up into chapters headed by the names of the prisons where he was held. For me, this by far the most interesting part of the book - especially the parts about the life of a Category A prisoner. 

This is where we really come to know Nilsen, even appreciate his sense of humour which really surprised me, and get a handle on his own sense of right and wrong . He describes about how he keeps himself occupied, his hobbies, his rare friendships, relationships and moves between different prisons, right up until his final illness and death. He writes of a quiet and mild mannered prisoner devoted to music, film studies, his budgies and writing about his life - although he does seem to get into trouble on occasion. He talks at length about working with various authors and journalists though is mostly disparaging about their efforts, and he is down right hostile when recounting the way the gutter press portray him - though considering the mostly fictitious articles, it is hardly surprising.

Although, much of his writing is clearly intended to paint him in a positive light, Nilsen freely acknowledges his guilt in the untimely deaths of 12 young men here and does show remorse for his crimes - although perhaps, his reasoning about his motives is a bit tenuous and his assertion that he is a different person to what he once was could never have been proven while he was a prisoner. His account is cogent and does throw up some meaty themes for debate around the nature of imprisonment and whether prisoners are there to be punished or reformed, and the contentious whole life sentences.

There are also some questions to be asked about the ownership of the personal possessions and written accounts of prisoners, and whether they should be allowed to publish their memoirs while still alive. I am inclined to side with the Home Office on this one, bearing in mind the thoughts and feelings of the families of the victims, but others may disagree. In any case, Nilsen's memoirs have now seen the light of day, and his long held wish to have his voice heard has now been fulfilled, for better or worse. 

"There are monsters in this world;

they're just people.

There are strong people and there are weak people.

I think I am an amalgam of the two.

Judge for yourself."

Denis Nilsen 

This is a very conflicting book to read, and is definitely one for the more reflective reader, rather than the serial killer groupie out for gruesome details of a murder's modus operandi. If you are going to take the plunge, I recommend reading both the foreword and introduction again once you have reached the end of the book, to remind yourself that the contents should be viewed with caution. Nonetheless, this is a fascinating book and one which I can recommend if you are interested in reading an account straight from the horses mouth, rather than through the eyes of someone with their own agenda.

History of a Drowning Boy is available to buy now from your your favourite book retailer.

Thank you to Helen Lewis of Literally Public Relations and RedDoor Press for providing me with an e-book copy of this book in return for an honest review.